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5 Best Movie Corpses of All Time

May 7th 2008 03:02
There’s nothing like a good corpse in a movie. Well… good plot, characters, direction, music, script and cinematography are probably better, but a good corpse can really get things going too.

So, here’s a brief list of the best corpse moments in films. I’m not talking about actual deaths here… rather when we come across some unlucky sod who has already shuffled off the mortal coil, leaving only a breathing-impaired bag of meat to shock and delight our indelicate sensibilities.

So, without further ado…

Gwyneth Paltrow



5 – Seven. No, I’m not referrig to the fat dude in the tighty-whiteys with his face in his porridge. I’m actually referring to Gwyneth Paltrow’s head in a box. In addition to being one of the great movie endings in modern cinema, it’s also Gwyneth Paltrow’s head in a box. Even though you don’t actually see the head, it’s still Mrs Coldplay’s finest performance to date. In a perfect world, all movies would end with Gwyneth Paltrow’s head in a box. Especially Shakespeare in Love.

4 - Weekend at Bernies. Okay, so Bernie’s not actually the most gruesome corpse to grace a movie screen, but he has more charisma than your average worm-food. Besides, when I finally kick the proverbial bucket, I’d love it if someone was motivated enough to animate my lifeless corpse, Weekend at Bernies-style.

Weekend at Bernies



3 – Jaws. The scene I’m referring to is the one where the severed head pops out of the sunken boat. Man, as a young ‘un, that disembodied noggin scared the bejeebus out of me. It’s an image that has always stuck with me, hence it’s inclusion here.

2 – Raiders of the Lost Ark. You know the one I mean. In the opening scene where Indy discovers a mouldering corpse who ran afoul of some big sharp spikes. Later Alfred Molina, after betraying Indy for the little golden idol, would impale himself on the very same spikes. Take that for betrayng Indy, you cad!

The Ring


1 – The Ring. The girl in the closet has gotta be one of the creepiest corpses ever to be discovered by screaming teenagers. Man, that’s one ugly cadaver. I think it’s the unnaturally wide-open mouth that does it… I know how she feels though - I felt the same way after coming across a “cursed” videotape in my parents bedside drawer.

I’m sure I’ve made some glaring ommissions, so please feel free to highlight my ignorance in the messages below.
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10 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Bianca S

May 7th 2008 03:33
I wouldnt say this one is one of the best, but its bloody gross... Umm i cant remember her name but the skanky red haired chick, that gets the barbed wire across the mouth in 'Wrong Turn'. then they like chopped her up.
Wicked Gross!!!

Comment by Bryn

May 7th 2008 04:33
I'd have to go with The Ring too ... I think the American corpse is actually more shocking than the Japanese one, although the Jap movie is better than the US remake.
Technically Se7en and Jaws aren't "corpses" per se, as a corpse refers to a body, and they were disembodied heads ... but hey, I'm being pedantic.
My pick is the roasted corpse of Helen Mirren's lover at the end of The Cook, the Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover. Tasty.
Or the arrow-addled body of the warrior king in Kurasawa's version of Macbeth, Throne of Blood.
... or to be a smart-arse, the corpse that wasn't actually a corpse at the end of Saw

Comment by Brad Gaylard

May 7th 2008 04:53
Hey Bryn, point taken re: the difference between a corpse and a disembodied head. I like to play fast with the rules though, and I just had to get Gwyneth Paltrow's head in a box there somewhere.

Nice one with The Cook, The Thief etc... it's been a while I saw that but, doesn't she end up eating his... uh... tummy bratwurst?

I wonder if I'm the only person who thinks Gore Verbinski's Ring is better than the Japanese one.

Comment by Bryn

May 7th 2008 06:27
Helen forces her pig husband (the cook) to eat her lover's cock. Greta moment in cinema history. I'm wanting to get a decent copy of it on DVD and on amazon they sell for up to $US90 !!!
I thought the US remake of The Ring was very good, but I preferred the creepiness of the Japanese original, same goes for The Grudge.

Comment by RubySoho

May 7th 2008 07:34
A "cursed" videotape in your parents drawer? Please tell me more...



Lemonheads have a song called "here comes Gwyneth's head in a box" on their Car Button Cloth Album.

Comment by Holly Go Lightly

May 9th 2008 07:31
I don't watch these types of movies but you certainly do KNOW your movies, well done.

Comment by May

May 12th 2008 10:57
Funnily enough, this post is like that of a scary/horror movie for me...i know it's not gonna be good and yet i still wanna see it!

The pictures that is...not the content. I don't mind descriptions about cadavers left out too long with or without fomaldehyde preservation...i just can't handle visuals....and scary atmosphere.

I gather you are not a fan of Ms Paltrow then??

Comment by James Rickard

September 6th 2008 04:12
*RAISING HAND* Trivia time, People!

Who was the corpse in "The Big Chill?"

A. Kevin Costner. (Gotta be true--I read it on the Web!


Comment by Bryn

September 8th 2008 01:24
James, they even shot flashback scenes with Costner, but they were cut out. Only his stitched wrists remain.

Comment by Anonymous

November 7th 2008 23:06
when i was a kid i accidentily caught a glimpse of a tv-series my parents were watching... i was completely traumatized by a sudden close-up of a floating corpse under water, in between some barrels. i think it was Jamaica Inn. i agree with the ring as #1, but to me this was #2.
gotta love celluloid

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